No Peeking


The hardest part of the unknown is not having security. Somethings that are held back from your knowing and end up being a grand surprise in your favor and sometimes they confirm a negative feeling. Even with my over re-enforced belief that good things come to those that wait my insecurities override any kind of spiritual gravity.

  I have an infinite go around with both God and the dark side. I have spent some time in both camps and often toggle between both when I need immediate answers to perplex situations. I don’t get quick answers from God and there are times when I feel he sticks his fingers in his ears when I cry out for help or even thank him. The dark side and I include all the practitioners that God has deemed never to go to, for a small price can give you flash insight and sometimes without be exact they tell you what you want to hear. In all fairness sometimes they tell you what you don’t want to hear, they tell you what you need to hear.

   There are some things I am more than patient with, certain people I am more apt to tolerate than others and depending on the situation I am more patient waiting for a response to something that will directly affect me. When it comes to financial or matters of the heart I am less likely to wait things out, I want to know where things are heading to prepare myself. I have consulted many unreliable dark sources double dipped in light to get a read on a couple of current leads. After  a great deal of thought it suddenly dawned on me that every time tried to see into something on the horizon so I could try to alter the result in some way, what I thought I had got further from my reach.

   Right now, something I really really want and have been waiting for is on the horizon and my urge to consult someone with “Insight” is consuming me. I want to know but my track record for peeking hasn’t been good so I will take the pieces of silver I would have wasted on consultation and spend it on something real. I think I finally got it, I am not supposed to know of my blessing so I am not going to cheat fate this time

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